Thursday, February 13, 2020

What Am I Choosing Every Day?


It’s absolutely blissful for me to be here in Amanzimtoti at Stella Maris.
The sound of the sea…
The sea breezes…
The quietness…
The lovely views… day and night…
The simplicity…

















I’m glad we chose to come to Stella Maris – again.
It’s more than three years since we’ve been here.
We’ve been coming for many years – I can’t remember how many.
I wondered if it too had slid down the path of neglect that seems to be so much around us…
Not so.
It’s still well maintained, and well managed.

I chose two books to bring with me:















I’m loving reading them - again!

I’ve read them both before.
I don’t remember most of what I read of them long ago.
I enjoy Scott Peck’s thoughts and explanations – most of them resonate with me.
They’ve both made me think…
And question!  Why…???!!!  Why do I agree? Why do I not agree? 
What do I think about what he is talking about?

I’m also loving catching up on my Ensign, New Era and Friend magazine reading.
For some reason beyond me, I can’t get to my usual Gospel Library.
I resorted to my paper scriptures, and intermittent ChurchoJesusChrist.org magazine reading.
Inconvenient…
When we came here I continued scripture reading on my phone,
leaving my bulky scriptures at home.
I picked up my magazine reading again on my phone.
I MISS MY TABLET which ceased to support the newer Gospel Library software.
(I think that’s how I describe what happened…)
I’ll probably get to getting a tablet again specifically for my Gospel Library reading.

Reading on the computer is distracting – notifications flash on my screen.
They also do on my phone.
I prefer to be “single minded” and undistracted early in the morning.

What wonderful choices I have!  Every Day!
These above are FEW of the many I can choose!

What choices do you enjoy?  And find frustrating?

I love you all!

Mom / Judy 

Saturday, February 1, 2020

Sunday Afternoon Feb 1st 2020 - Thank you!


Who are those helping me along?  Many people actually.
Every day Glenn helps me in some way or another.
This last week he installed some lights above my working counter.
What a great help!
He helps keep me down to earth, in touch with reality.
I’ve learnt a lot from him and with him.

I’m again reading a book by M Scott Peck “In Search of Stones.”
M Scott Peck and many other authors have helped me along to where I want to go…
I’m also leisurely reading the Reader’s Digest compilation called “How to Live with Life.”
Short pieces by many of the wise ones of the world.
I’ve learnt a lot about a lot, from those who write down what they have learnt.
(I miss the Reader’s Digest! Not printed any more for South Africa…)

TED talks, radio, General Conference, Internet, magazines, people I meet…
Many people I know, and those I don’t, help me along.

We’re having scheduled stage 2 load-shedding this morning from 8am-noon.
Those who keep the lights on, and repair systems when they go down –
They help me along... they make my life ore care-free.
Those who made this computer, and create all it can do, help me along!

I am… because of so, so many who use their time, talent and means to do what they do.
I hope more and more of us love what we are doing each day!
And, by being who we each are, help some their along their way.

Of course… there are those who “help” – but don’t help!
I hope I’m among that number less and less!
Hopefully I’m learning more and more to read subtle cues.


Sunday, January 19, 2020

Sunday Afternoon - January 19th 2020 - My Search Continues...


My Daily Search for … Continues…

What am I searching for…?

When I was a new family and marriage counsellor I had a young client.
She came out to South Africa from Holland? Germany? and found herself
in a complex situation she could hardly have imagined.

She looked at me earnestly and said “All I want is a nice quiet life…”
We worked together to deal with her newly realised reality.

I’ve pondered her words lots in the intervening 30+ years.
“Yes.  That’s what I want too.” I remember thinking at the time.
“ And now I have the words to express my deepest desire.  Thank you!”

In some respects my life is not what others would call “quiet…”

What then does “quiet” mean to me?
Sufficient harmony within myself and with those I live and work with.
And I have that most times these days...
I conserve and nurture my goodwill with myself and with particularly these others. 
I create the peacefulness I need, within myself, and around me every day.

I heard someone talk recently about important “holy habits” and “righteous routines.”
I have developed what works for me and gives me pleasure.

Tai Chi every week is important to me.
It helps me be physically and mentally more peaceful.

I found my Tai Chi group I used to belong to at the Botanic Gardens this week!
They meet an hour earlier!
That’s why I have missed them since we got home!
Happy Day!
Steve, one of the leaders, said “I can see you did Tai Chi while you were in KZN…”
Indeed, I did, every week.  Sometimes on the beach, sometimes in the garden,
sometimes in our apartment, sometimes on our West balcony.
One of my righteous routines…
The group has progressed to level 4.  I am well-schooled in levels 1 and 2.
On Tuesday I was delightfully clumsy in the next two levels!
I giggled and giggled as I tried my best to follow.
As you know I have difficult with my left and my right.
So when Lynda said “drop your left hand and circle your right” it was
a significant mental feat for me to follow her…
There’s a child-likeness to not knowing that is very blissful for me.

Another righteous routine is a bath in the afternoon.
It helps me physically and gives me a good soak.  “Relax.  Unwind.  Soak.”
Oh yeah…!  Thank you Dianne for “Relax. Unwind!”
She has those words on her bathroom wall.

What are you searching for, reaching for?
How’s your search going?
Some searches take a life-time… and beyond…

“A happy life must be, to a great extent, a quiet life – for it is only in
an atmosphere of quiet that true joy can live.”
Bertrand Russell said in “Boredom and Excitement” –
(Reader’s Digest – How To Live With Life, p 219 “Slow Down - and Live.”

May we all prosper in the deepest meanings of the word this 2020.


Love

Mom / Judy

Yep... it was chilly enough - in January! to wear a cardigan on Sunday.





PS We began functioning as Young Single Adult advisors…
A Whole New Learning Curve for Us!
Working together… that is a new one…
We’re good at parallel work… Now we’ll get to working on companion work…
Here’s hoping… 

I liked these companion sculptures at
The newish Cradlestone Mall Muldersdrift, near Krugersdorp.

















Sunday, January 12, 2020

Sunday Afternoon - Values


Eish… I’m discovering I have a limit to long walks…
I wonder if it is the highveld altitude?
Or the need for walking is walking further than I’m used to?

Anyway… I’ll find out what my walking comfort level is and stick to within it.
Perhaps I will work on stretching my limits too.
(I’m VERY grateful to be sleeping more soundly!)

We walked and walked looking for the easier-sliding curtain rails we prefer.
Glenn is now replacing the previous ones with the newly acquired ones.
That should stress the curtains less as we open and close them.

The new kitchen door security gate is in… still needs some touch-up painting…
BUT – I feel more relaxed when I am in the front part of our part of the house.
At the same time… it is harder for Doug, Nadia, Ethan, Daena and Cabryn to pop in.
Doug has a key… Perhaps another one is needed for Nadia and the children…
Grrr… !!!  Difficult trade-off decisions to be made sometimes…

Glenn installed a dishwasher and a washing machine for our other-side-of-the-house tenants.
(Nadia’s sister Kayla and her husband.)
The dishwasher in the old main bedroom, now living area.
The washing machine in the en-suite bathroom bay window area.
It was a significant installation!
I’m so grateful Glenn can do this and that.
It’s a great comfort and blessing to me…

We went on a Friday lunch-date to Second Cup, Weltevreden Farm.
A lovely venue where the tables are in amongst the trees.
The roosters and hens run around.  A friendly cat came and meowed companionably.
I was deeply soul-glad to be there.

Glenn and I are called and set apart as Young Single Adult advisors…
That will be a whole new experience for us!

Have a good week!

Love

Mom / Judy















Early morning sunrise on the way to the Temple.


















  
 Us at Second Cup.
And our new security gate...




Monday, December 16, 2019

Another Whirr of a Week


Sunday morning – 15th December 2019 

A week of sorting, saving and sharing -
Bringing increasing order and familiarity to my home and world.

This week I shared some more things with the Charity Shop.
Then I thought “I wonder if anyone in the Ward needs any of this…”
I’m not on the Relief Society WhatsApp group yet…
So that is what I will be sure to have happen today.
I asked to be put on last Sunday… it’s not been done yet.

On Wednesday I went to the hair-dresser.
I always feel better after taking care of my hair…

Somehow or other I have developed a breath-gasping back-ache.
That’s required flat bed rest when it gets too intrusive.
On Friday I sought a chiropractor.
The one I used to go to was going on leave.
So was another I know.
I found one up the road, near the Junction Spar.
I went to him of Friday.
A work-out of note…
Today I feel more comfortable than I have for a week.
Here’s hoping my comfort level increases to my normal soon.

Friday evening we gathered at Doug and Nadia.
After a simple supper, and family socializing,
Ethan was ordained an Elder by Doug, assisted by Glenn and
Sheldon Torr representing the Soweto Stake.
Jarom was able to be “there” via phone.
It was a heart-warming experience.




















I joined my WeighLess group in Weltevreden Park on Saturday.
I will be checking in every Saturday at 8am.
That just reminds me of accountability for maintaining my goal weight.
I made a resolution about 48 years ago to maintain a healthy weight.
It saves money on clothes!  And saves pain and discomfort…  I hope.
I’ve been in my goal-weight range for many years – thanks to checking-in
almost weekly with WeightWatchers (now pulled out of the country.)
and now WeighLess – a South African programme.  Better than WeightWatchers –
though I prefer the name WeightWatchers I must say...
(Last Saturday morning we were at the Temple with Richard and Emily.)
(Another Emily in the ‘family!’)

I have now found a dry-cleaner to take Glenn’s suit to…
I bought and put together a dual rail for the spare-room store-room.
I’m proud of myself!  I thought along the way “Not all the pieces are here…”
But they were… and I found a way to put it together…




















(Glenn was at the chiropractor on Saturday morning.)

We joined Arthur and Denise Butterfield and the Dessert Club for lunch on Saturday.
We enjoyed a delicious meal – thank you Arthur and Denise.
I enjoyed catching-up with those whom we have met with monthly for many years.
I’m shocked I must say.  They all look so much older…
Sobering…  I wonder if we look “so much older…” to them.
Food for thought…  
I don’t feel older… except for the recovering back-ache…

Glenn and I both spoke in our Discovery Ward Sacrament meeting this morning.

Monday Morning (public holiday - Day of Reconciliation)

This morning I feel a little tearful.  Not sure why.
Maybe I’m just peopled-out.
Time to go and spend a couple of hours in the Botanic Garden.
I’ll go and visit my Dad’s grave too.
I have stones to add to those probably still there.
(I take stones from where I have been and lay them there when I can.)
I did a Tai Chi routine this morning in the front garden
Then spent 10 minutes in the garden.
One patch is a little clearer.
I will do ten minutes when I can – back permitting.
My back feels a little easier this morning.
I will take care of it so it can take care of me!

Have a good week!







Sunday, December 1, 2019

Sunday Afternoon - Home Again!


We had a peaceful and delicious breakfast on Thursday at The Little Church in Van Reenen… we were on our way home…


 And yes, we are home again…
We had thunder and lightning and rain Thursday night when we arrived, and after Ethan, Daena, Cabryn and Roisin (Nadia’s sister) helped carry all the stuff in…  
We are home!
I walk around bare-foot on our carpets… We are home!
I bathed in my own bath… We are home!
The church bells rang this morning…  We are home!
The peaches and apricots are ripe… We are home!
The birds are chirping and chirping outside… We are home!

And we have room!

Douglas has built upstairs in the property behind us and moved some of his stuff there. 


This week we will move more there to clear the front room off the entrance hall and prepare it for Les and Sally who arrive next weekend.
Richard, their youngest, is marrying and being sealed in the Temple on Saturday.
I am looking forward to that precious time with Les and Sally.
I enjoy having my brothers to stay, when they come to Gauteng for whatever reason.
Actually, I just enjoy visitors – and I prefer them shortish-term, whenever possible.

The other front room, Doug’s office, will be next on the list to clear to next door behind, then we’ll be all on our own in our part of the house.
And we’ll make that front room and the adjoining ‘piano room’ into what we need them to be for this stage of our lives.
(The piano room is already transformed – we did that before we left - it has a new built-in-cupboard which is very useful.)
(I’ll share pictures when all the new stuff is closer to ‘finished’ than it is right now.)

I to Glenn "If one of us is alone in the future we might well end up in one room."
We have much to share now with those less fortunate than we are.
I will take a load of our many clothes to the charity shop tomorrow.
Other items will be sure to follow.

We’ve been packing in La Lucia for weeks now.
A bit at a time…
By the time Thursday came, we were ready – just about.
I realized when I was in Pietermaritzburg that I’d left a few items in the fridge…
Ah well, the movers will have 6 eggs, delicious bean soup (which I meant to leave for those who clean and tend the estate) and probably a few other this’s and that’s…

I loved being there for the three years and five months that our home was there.
I loved being closer to John, Brenda, Vi, Craig, Roxane, Madi and Kirsty.
I mastered more technology… what a blessing!
I met and got to know many people I never would have otherwise.
We lived where we would never have otherwise.
We went places and did things we never would have otherwise.
I’m glad we went.

As I said to one of my colleagues who commented that I really enjoyed being there, 
“I enjoy my life… wherever I am.  Each day that passes will never come again.  I want as few regrets as possible when it is my time to die.”

I’m glad to be home…
I love my home…
We’ve spent many years making it very comfortable, functional, and pleasing to me/us.
Interesting – I don’t even miss the other side of the house.
This part is very suitable.

I’ll spend ten early minutes a day in the garden, and ten minutes a day on a ‘hotspot.’
FlyLady terminology… Finally Love Yourself Lady.
FlyLady has been very useful in ‘liberating’ me to a greater degree.
Do you know about it?

I look forward to going to the Botanical Gardens again.
One of my places of refuge/refreshing/being.

It’s good to be home!
It’s good to be alive!  See, hear, smell, taste, touch, think, move, be, LIVE!

We have a heat wave this weekend – it is hot.
We have the fan on, and the doors and windows wide open.
Most tolerable, most pleasant, when that is possible.

Northerners… Enjoy your deepening December.
Somehow Christmas in Winter is “the way it should be…”
“We” in the South have been indoctrinated by the Northern countries – 
through many years!

Somehow Christmas Dinner (hot) is just not right here…
And Christmas cake/pudding here needs to be ice-cream…
To each their own. We’ll have a swim on Christmas day to cool down.
That’s appropriate here.

This little bird, big actually, was by our front gate when I drove in from shopping yesterday…
Black Friday weekend… What was I thinking?!
I was glad to see this at-ease bird!
Do any of you know what it is?


Monday, November 18, 2019

Sunday Afternoon - A Week of Miracles


I sat down on the spare bed to write and lay down to sleep!  And I did – all afternoon!
This is so unusual for me...
I must have been tired!
So here it is, late afternoon.  It’s raining gently outside.  Warm rain.

We had a week of rain forecast this last week. Two miracle clear days…
Tuesday and Wednesday were sunny days – enabling us to prepare the site for
Presiding Bishop Caussé’s inspection visit on Thursday.

I had my bunch of car keys in my jeans pocket on Tuesday. 
I lost them – somewhere on the site…
My heart sunk.
A few weeks ago a rucksack was stolen out of a car boot on the site.
Passports and other valuables were stolen.
I had not much hope of finding my car keys.
Nevertheless, I told one of the foremen.
And prepared to find Glenn and come home to get my spare car keys and another key to the flat.
Glenn was away from the site, so I paused in alerting him.
A couple of hours later my car keys were safely returned to me.
One of the worker I know – Chicken is his name – had found them.
I was very grateful for another miracle.

I visited Gateway shopping mall for work on Wednesday –
Gateway is an enormous mall in Umhlanga.
I go there as seldom as possible…  It’s just too big, and noisy, for me.
When I got home I realized I had lost my memory stick containing back-ups 
of the site reports, somewhere.
I searched the car, the site office, home… and figured out I must have lost it somewhere
on my visit to Gateway.
Well – I had no hope of finding it again.
I was reconciled to getting another memory stick and redoing what I had done.

On Thursday 8:01am - from my niece-in-law Roxane Holmes –

She attached the conversation she had been part of late Wednesday evening:

Wednesday 22:54 – to Roxane

“Hi Roxane.  This is Nhla. Trynna get hold of Judy.  Can you help?”

“Hi.  Which Judy?”

“Judy Bray…”

(His/her name and phone number attached…)

Its regarding the usb that I found.  Thank you.”

“Send me yr details and I will ask her to contact you in the morning.”

Thursday 8:01am (read by me at about 9:45 am) - from Roxane

“Hi Judy… got a message from someone I don’t know looking to get hold of you…
Says u lost a memory stick?”

“Yes!  A red and black one with a meerkat decorative tag.
Oh, I so hope for it to come back to me…”

“The person’s number is on the message.  I hope you get it back.
Incredible that the person messaged me to find you.”

“Whew! yes! I will contact him/her.”

“Let me know how it goes.”

Thursday 10:07am - Me to Nhla - him/her –

“Good morning,

I’m very grateful you found my memory stick.
I was becoming reconciled to it not coming back.
I’m greatly relieved to know I might have it again.
I’m also glad that you found something that identified
someone I know and made the effort to make contact with me.

I’m very occupied for the next few hours with meetings I need to be at on the site.
Is it possible to meet you later this afternoon or tomorrow please to collect my USB?

Grateful regards,
Judy Bray

PS I will see your reply…I don’t know when today…”

Thursday 1:39pm – From Nhla

“I live at…
I work at… Monday to Friday …
I take a taxi…
Since you’re currently occupied, I’ll hear from you when you get to me.
Thank you.”
  
Thursday 6:53pm – from Roxane

“Hi, did you get your memory stick back?”

Thursday 7:00pm  - to Roxane

“Been busy with top management all day.
Sent a message.
Got a reply.
Will arrange to get tomorrow.”

“That’s awesome.  I was so worried it was a scam.”

“I will fetch today from where he/she works – hospital in …”

“Incredible.  I’m so happy it’s coming back to you.”

Thursday 7:10pm – to Nhla

“A moment to pause after a very busy day today!
Phew!
Can I come to your work and fetch it tomorrow please?
If so, where shall I find you?”

7:49pm – from Nhla

“Same here.  Time to chill indeed!
You’ll find me in the hospital pharmacy.
Just ask for Nhla.”

Friday 10:27am – to Nhla

“I will come to the pharmacy around midday, twelve?”

10:53 – from Nhla

“That’s fine.”

I got there at midday not knowing whether I was meeting a man or a woman.

I asked the young cashier for Nhla.
I thought "Maybe you are Nhla...?"
She looked at me blankly.

I showed my phone to her with the name and surname.
Her face cleared.
She pointed to a young man across the pharmacy serving someone.
I waited until the two seated people he was helping arose and left.

I introduced myself and we had a truly lovely conversation.

He had thought when he found the USB that this was a fortunate find!
A memory stick with lots of music and movies perhaps…

When he saw the content, he realized this must be very important to whoever lost it.
So he set about trying to figure out who might have lost it.
He says it took him three hours to figure something out.

He found the reports and photos interesting.
He thought the building was unique.
He saw a few surnames recurring in the reports.
He looked them up on social media.

He came across my facebook profile.
He knew it was me because I registered as site missionary on the Durban Temple construction.
But no public information.
He looked at who might know me, have tagged me.
Roxane Holmes tagged me sometime in one of her posts.
He looked at her profile and whom she was connected with.
There he found I was familially connected with her.
So he contacted her…

I hugged him.
I asked him if I could take a photo of him.
He said yes.



I gave him the meerkat tag as a token of this special occasion.
He was thrilled.
I gave him some money “to do something special with.”
“You don’t need to…” he said.
“I know I don’t need to… I want to.” I said.

I was tearful as I walked to my car shaking my head.
I said a humble and grateful Thank You prayer.

"Signs follow them that believe..."  I believe...

Friday 12:53pm – to Roxane

“Hi Roxane, I just fetched my memory stick from Nhla, young, newly graduated pharmacist.
He found my memory stick outside Gateway where I dropped it when getting my car keys out.
He realized it was very important when he looked at the contents of the Temple construction on it.
He found nothing on social media about me, but you had tagged me in one of your posts.  Amazing!
I believed in miracles before… I’m reassured of miracles this week.
He didn’t want to alarm you so he gave lots of details about himself.
Really personable young man.
I’m really grateful to God and both of you!
I’m so happy to have it back!”

“Ah this is wonderful news.  I’m so happy for you.”

Monday morning – very early…  The saga continued.

The miracles didn’t end there…

I sent a message to my editor on Friday around midday
when I usually send my weekly report for editing –

“Hi Helen, I haven’t even started my report yet.
I don’t know when I will get to it to you.”

On quiet Friday evening after supper –
the only evening this week with no visitors for supper!
 It’s been a very busy week preparing for Thursday!
(I thought “The least I can do is feed one or two of those who are working late to prepare…”)
(We usually have visitors only one evening during the week…)

Glenn was busy with his half-monthly technical report.
I thought I might watch a movie (using earphones) as I sometimes do, when Glenn is working.
I found myself in Microsoft Word… and a few inspired hours later my report was largely complete.

After a good night’s sleep I was wide awake when it starts getting light at around four thirty am.
I quietly opened the lounge curtains and said my early morning prayer.
I came to the spare room, silently closed the door, put on the bedside light and
did my morning New Testament and Book of Mormon scripture study.

John, Brenda and Vi were due to come to us this weekend.
I had earlier-baked banana muffins in the fridge for tea.
I usually have a choice of two goodies to eat…
I decided to make brownies as well – that is easy and quick to make.
I thought “I can do that later…”

I opened my weekly report number 167 and critically read through it.
A few minor changes to make…

I thought “I’ve got time to start putting the collage together… maybe…”
I set to work.
I kid you not… I felt so thoroughly inspired as (was it I?) I edited the later batch of photos –
That usually takes much longer than creating the collage!
And then I pieced the collage together.  Was it really I?
I felt so completely, tinglingly, guided as chose photos and put it together.
I breathed more thank-you prayers during and afterwards.

I sent my report and collage off to Helen for editing…
(I read her reply on Sunday morning “Well done Judy - No changes to be made this week.”)

I made the brownies, we had John, Brenda and Vi here from 11am until nearly five pm…

Glenn and I enjoyed a quiet evening together.
Glenn slept in his recliner chair and I watched a hard-to-watch-in-one-part, made-for-TV movie.
(I’m glad for the ability to pulse through some parts - of some really worthwhile movies…)
 “Taking Back my Life – The Nancy Ziegenmeyer Story” was the movie's name.
Sobering…   She was raped in 1990. 
(How much good progress we have made as a society…
As well as back-sliding in other aspects…)  

And now – It’s a new week.
I slept a couple of hours yesterday afternoon and was awake at 4:15 this morning.
I got up, quietly came to the spare room and finished this off.

I’m grateful to have recorded this fuller account of this last week of miracles…
I shake my head while marveling again.

And now 6:02am…

Time for my daily scripture study, to the sound of our two resident Mallard ducks honking down at the fountain in the background...

And then on – into my Marvellous Monday and this New Week.
This may be our last full week here...
Will probably be.

It's been SO GOOD to be here for the last three plus years!
Serving God and our fellow men... what a privilege, what an opportunity.
What a responsibility.

And we'll carry on... serving God and our fellow men, back home again.